


Guilty {A Newtmas Short Story}

by demondean111



Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2016-10-09
Packaged: 2018-02-23 13:05:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2548541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demondean111/pseuds/demondean111
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Thomas goes over his first day of school. In his head, it's a lot more detailed.</p>
<p>Song for Chapter: Let's Cheer To This</p>
          </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

**Guilty**

_Preview_

* * *

 

 

"My client pleas guilty." Thomas's lawyer states.

"He admits to his own crime? How odd. Still, we must hear the story. Mr. Thomas Santer, please explain your plea."

"Where to start, where to start?" Thomas mumbles, a evil smirk on his face. "Ah yes, why not from the beginning?" 

He laughs slightly at the memory. 

"It was the first day of my junior year in high school..."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**disclaimer: Guilty is a work of fiction and I do not own any of the characters. This story is just for entertainment purposes.**


	2. Chapter One: Day One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thomas goes over his first day of school. In his head, it's a lot more detailed.
> 
> Song for Chapter: Let's Cheer To This

* * *

 

 

"It was the first day of my junior year in high school..."

 

The memories flood back in his head as he speaks.

_"Thomas! Get up! You're going to be late!" My mom yells from outside my room, her hand pounding on the door._

_I groan as an answer and slowly roll out of bed, literally._

 

"The day started off like any other day."

 

_I go through my closet, finding a button up shirt and a pair of slacks._

_After putting them on I tame my naturally spiky hair by putting gel in it. Running downstairs to the kitchen, I find a bowl, spoon, milk, and a cereal._

_I eat the cereal and clean my dish._

 

"I got up, got ready and went to school." 

 

_My school literally looks like a prison. But I've been on the school baseball and soccer team since freshmen year. I was pretty popular but at the same time I wasn't._

_Looking at my schedule, I try to find my locker._

_I'm slammed into and I lose my footing, stumbling a bit._

_"Watch it, why don't you?" I grumble._

_Looking up, I see a small blonde boy. In the back of the hall is two of the schools football players._

_"Sorry, I was being rude. Here, let me help you." I say and walk over to help him pick up his stuff._

_"Thanks, but you should leave. Wouldn't want to ruin your reputation," he whispers with an accent._

_"I don't care about reputation, British boy. I am not a douche bag."_

 

"Everything was normal until he ran just into me. His name was..."

 

_"so, what's your name, British boy? I'm Thomas but I can tell you probably knew that."_

_I stand up, reaching my hand down to pull him up._

_"I'm Newt. And Thomas, thanks for helping me but I don't need it."_

 

"His name was Newt. And for the entire day I couldn't not think about him. I never saw myself falling in love with a guy but there I was doing it."

 

_"Newt! Newt, hold up!"_

_I run through the crowd of students, trying to catch up to him._

_"Newt, look I didn't really understand the math or English. Can you help me with it tonight?"_

_"Um, Thomas I'm busy today... but I might be able to. Here's my number, call me when you're doing the homework."_

_His accent sounds like music to my ears and butterflies grow in my stomach._

"And, don't worry, I know it sounds cliche, but I'm telling you, this boy did weird things to my heart." 

_I smile slightly, "okay, I'll be calling you."_

_He nods and waves bye. He turns slowly and walks off. And he was really the only thing I thought about until I called him._

"And, well, that was really where it all started."

**-**

**EEEEEPPP. I'm so sorry it took so long for me to get this out.**

 


	3. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thomas and Newt go on a "study" date and Newt learns that Thomas I very forward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I havent posted in a while  
> Don't hate me :(

* * *

"Nothing else really happend for the next few weeks... We texted and became pretty good friends."

_He hadnt replied. I stared down at the screen of my phone._

**_From: Thomas_ **

**_To: Newtie's Booty ;)_ **

  ** _wanna go on a study date? I need helpppppp_**

**_sent 15 minutes ago_ **

_My heart pounded in my chest as I awaited a reply. I was completely infactuated with this boy. From the moment we met, he had been in my thoughts._

_A few minutes later, as I was staring blankly at my homework, my phone buzzed._

**_From: Newtie's Booty ;)_ **

**_To: Thomas_ **

**_uhhhhhhh, sure. Wanna meet at the coffee shop near the school in 20 minutes?_ **

**_sent now_ **

_My thumbs imediently started typing a reply and I hit the send button near the bottom of my screen._

**_From: Thomas_ **

**_To: Newtie's Booty ;)_ **

**_sure, I'll be there. Can't wait to see you. ;)_ **

**_sent now_ **

_he had been dealing with my little flirty texts for a week now and it was quite funny to see his reaction, saying he was a rather shy boy._

_I had hurried around my room to make sure my hair looked alright, make sure I smelled alright. As I rushed out, I hurried back into my room to grab my homework._

"It wasn't until September 29th when something finally happened, but I wont get into much detail about that..." I laughed lightly

_"what do you need help with?" Newt asked as he sat down next to me._

_"Chemistry." I sigh and look over at him._

_I watched as his eyes skimmed over the paper._

_"You look nice." I point out with a smile._

_He was in his usual attire, simple black slacks and a blue button up shirt._

_A small blush crept on his cheeks as he mumbled a quiet thanks._

_"You're cute when you blush." I point out, grinning and leaning closer to him._

_His cheeks become a deep red as I lean closer to him._

_"I like you, you know. I like you a lot."_

_"I-I, um, I l-l-like you too," he stammers, bringing his eyes to mine._

_I smile and tilt my head to the side to get a better look at him._

_I lean in slowly, giving him plenty of time to pull away from me, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. My lips melt onto his and I resist the urge to smile. His arms wrap around my neck and I deepen the kiss._

_Soon, he is straddling me and my hands are slowly pulling off his shirt._

"And it was there when I became completely infatuated with him. Of course, it was only soon after when it ... took a turn." A smirk grows on my lips

 


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a few months of dating, Newt and Thomas decide to skip school and get to know each other better  
> *Warning- Sexual Content, read at your own risk*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't been on, so I'm writing a super long chapter

 

* * *

 

"My mom, really gave you a perfect description of how we were," I say, " really, just a usual couple. We went on dates, hung out at school. I will admit though, I was quite jealous when he would talk to other boys."

_I watched from afar as Newt was obliviously being flirted with. Anger boiled in my veins and I walked over to where he was, as casual as I could._

_"Hey, Newt." I smile and eye the other boys defensively. They get the idea and step aside some._

_Newt comes up to hug me and his arms wrap around me, as mine around him. "Missed you," I mumbled in his ear and kissed his neck playfully._

_Out of the corner of my eye, I see the other boys leave and I smile._

_"Babe," I mumble, "Wanna just skip today? My parents won't be home till late."_

_I feel him nod hesitantly._

_"Newt, babe, we don't have to if you aren't comfortable with it."_

_"It's okay," He assures me and I nod._

_"C'mon, before any teachers see us leave." I intertwine our fingers and pull him behind me, leading him to my car._

"We skipped school, to hang out at my place. I learned a lot about him and his likings that day..." I smirk, thinking at the memory.

_-_

_As we pulled up to my house, I unbuckle my seatbelt._ _I stop the car, get out of the car, and open the door for Newt._

_"T-thanks," he smiles shyly as he exits the car._

_We get inside my house and into my room._ _Newt sits on the bed and I follow after him._ _A sudden burst of confidence seems to take him over, as Newt moves to straddle me and leans down into a kiss._ _Our lips connect and I place my hands at his hips. His arms wrap around my neck and I pull him closer to me._ _His lips move in sync with mine and after a few seconds, I suck on his bottom lip while rubbing small circles in his hip, drawing a moan from his lips._ _I flip us over so I'm on top of him and my hands slip under his shirt._ _Newt's legs wrap completely around me, my hips now settling between his thighs._ _As the makeout session progresses, another moan leaves his lips._

_Newt tangles his fingers in my hair and mumbles, "Daddy, please."_

_The words drive me and I pull away so I can pull off his shirt, along with mine._

_Newt's hands go to my chest and outline the noticeable muscles._

_I kiss down his neck and collarbone, stopping to suck and bite at the skin occasionally._ _I trail down lower, kissing down his chest._

_Moans constantly leave Newt's swollen lips._

_I stop to look at him, and he looks at me and begs, "Daddy, please, it hurts." He whines about the bulge in his jeans._

_I nod and unbutton and unzip his jeans before tugging them down harshly._

_I make eye contact with him as I slowly pull down his boxers, his erected cock springing out._ _He whines again, impatiently waiting for relief._ _I bring my lips to the tip and part them slowly._

_A high pitched moan leaves Newt's mouth and he follows by saying, "More Daddy, please."_

_I begin to take more of Newt in. I squeeze my eyes shut and relax my throat so I don't gag as I continue to take him in my mouth._

_A series of small, whiney, moans comes from him and he tangles his fingers in my hair again._

_After I take as much as I can in, I begin to bob my head slowly._

_I get moans in reaction. I slow down some, taking breaths through my nose._ _My tongue runs along the underside of Newt's cock and his hips buck._

_"Th-Thomas, I-I'm gonna come." He manages to say between long moans._

_I quicken my pace. Soon after my pace quickens, Newt comes into my mouth and I swallow the liquid slowly._

_I pull away from him and look at his face. Sweat covers his forehead and his cheeks are red._

_I bring my lips to his ear, "Did Daddy make you feel good?"_

_He nods, "Very good, Daddy."_

_I kiss his nose and smile._

"And what did you do while alone?" The judge asked with a raised eyebrow.

"We watched movies, mostly," I shrug. It wasn't a complete lie.

 

 


	5. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thomas breaks. The story unfolds, but not everything is yet told. Break ups, break downs, black outs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry not for posting anything! I'm going to probably make the next chapter in 2 parts. Then that'll be it. Thank you for all of the great comments.

 

* * *

 

I could see on the judges face that he was getting impatient with my ongoing story, so I jump ahead quite a bit.

"I'll admit," I start, "I've been quite vague but that wasn't all that important other than to show you everything was, for a while normal. It was near the end of junior year when things got out of hand."

"And what do you mean by out of hand, Mr. Santer?" The judge asks.

"Well, Newt was getting quite suspicious. Of course, my family thought I was overreacting. "He's allowed to have friends," my mother would say.

"And of course I knew that, he was just getting farther away from me and closer to other boys. I would lose sleep, trying to figure out how to win him back and somewhere along the line, a voice started. A voice that it the one that I am left with today. Now, I never thought I was crazy, nor do I now, it's always been there, if you go far enough back on my medical record."

_I was five. It was my fifth birthday, I should be happy. Why am I not happy?_

**_you don't deserve it,_ ** _I can almost hear my dad say, **you don't deserve a birthday or to be happy. You know that**_

_Well, of course I do, why cant I just pretend? Like games we would play after you punished me._

"My father, biological, disappeared when I was 7. I couldn't cry on that day. Not until I realized I wouldn't be hit anymore. A seven year old boy, and I was depressed. Behind my mother's back and behind locked doors and soundproof walls, I was abused. His hands and his words carved into me. And at seven years old, I thought it would be over. I was wrong."

In the corner of my eye, I can see my mom's face, filled with regret and some surprise.

"At a birthday party, a few months after his disappearance, I ate a food my father would of punched me for having. And soon after I ate it, I heard his voice. It ran through my head and didn't allow me to think anything else. Until, I had ran into a bathroom and punched myself. I continued until the voice stopped and I was left with a bruise and upset stomach. I was, what doctors may call a Schizophrenic, but that wasn't what it was. He had done this on purpose. He meant to carve me out with his abuse, so I would think like him and act like him. And, at seven and a half, my thoughts copied my fathers perfectly."

The judge seems, amusingly, confused, "Yes, but how does this affect you killing Newt?"

I chuckled, "I don't understand how you could be so naïve. Newt was disobeying orders by being unfaithful and then lying about it, he had to be punished."

And I could hear everyone skip a breath and I just laughed again.

_"Newt, I swear to God, if you don't answer my call, you'd better be sick or dead." I grumble and try calling him again._

_I was at the movie theater, waiting for him for nearly an hour and he still hasn't shown up._

_After the call goes to voicemail, I shove my phone in my pocket hastily and walk to my car._

_Slamming the door after I sat down, I don't bother with a seatbelt and start the car._

_Driving 20 miles over the speed limit, I make it to Newt's house in minutes._

_I stop in the driveway and through the window I see he is definitely home._

_The light in his room is on but the shades are closed._

_I walk up to the front door and find the spare key, it was always hidden in the plant._

_I unlock and open the door as slow and quiet as I could._

_I close the door and walk up the familiar stairs to his room, which was closed._

_Even through the closed door, I could hear the gruesome sounds of Newt kissing another person._

 

_Hot, burning tears sting in my eyes as I throw the door open._

_My father's voice, one I could never forget, tells me what to do._

_I pull the other boy off him hastily and my hand swings across Newt's face._

_I smile smugly as I notice the forming bruise on his cheek._

_"Why, Newt? I gave you all of my time. Why did you do this?" My anger quickly turned to sadness and I couldn't bare looking at him, seeing the black and blue skin. Tears ran down my cheeks, blurring my vision completely._

_"I-I swear,T-Thomas, it isn't what it looks like." His voice shook in fear and uncertainty._

"We fought. And as he started to explain his utterly unfaithful ass, something inside me cracked. And I still own that crack."

My smile becomes twisted, wicked, and fake as the crack in had tried so hard to patch quickly opens again.

My knees buckle, I fall, and I don't feel anything other than my own tears and body shaking. 


	6. NOT A CHAPTER

IM REALLY SORRY

IM SO SORRY

I 

FORGOT

THE

PASSWORD

TO 

THIS

ACCOUNT

...

i have no words for myself god

like wow

this has gotten so much more popular since the last time I was on it

thank you

I'll finish the last chapter asap

it's 1:15 am right now. 

But I will finish it

IM SORRY AGAIN


	7. Chapter Six (Final Chapter)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thomas is found guilty and he goes to jail. But through his flashback, you learn how everything went down when Newt died

* * *

My eyes open slowly, the ceiling above me. 

Though I was not in control with what had happened, I remember it clearly.  

 I stood up, head spinning as I had hit it against the floor quite hard.

My thoughts at this point weren't even my own. My father, the one who did this to me, who made me this way, was poisoning my mind. He urged me to do all of this. I shouldn't have listened. I love Newt, but I can't tell him that anymore, because he's dead. And it was all my fault.

_"Dammit! Newt you fucking lying, worthless whore!" My voice tore through my throat, words spewing out before I could even process them._

_stop it, I told myself, you're hurting him. I could see in his innocent eyes, the brightness behind their hazel color quickly becoming dark and sad, that I was tearing his heart to bits._

_No matter how much I told myself that I could forgive him, that it was okay, I couldn't stop. I yelled nasty things to him. It got to the point where I was just yelling at him while he was curled into a ball. His body shook with sobs and the boy who had been with Newt was long gone. I wanted to stop. I wanted to hug him, tell him it was okay. Explain to him that I was just hurt. That my heart was literally being torn to bits because of what he had done._

_The more I wanted to stop the more angry my actions became._

_I was kicking him._

_Suddenly, I had kicked him._

_"SHUT UP" I barked at him, my foot making contact with his arm as I kicked him with all of my force._

_A sharp yelp in pain came from Newt._

_I could tell as he tried to get away._

_The anger in me faltered. Immediately I sobbed._

_Tears and cries racked through my entire body and I fell to the ground in a crumpled heap._

_"T-Tommy?" Newt's small and hurt voice called through the quiet room._

_I felt no anger, just sadness._

_There was shuffling and suddenly Newt was beside me._

_Guilt filled my entire body. His entire body shook and I could see in his eyes that he was scared of me. I was scared of me._

_"G-get away from me...I...I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you to hurt me."_

_"Thomas-"_

_I cut him off._

_"No, Newt! No! I-I can't be with you! You...You fucking cheated on me," I choked on the bitter words, "I hurt you just as much as you hurt me! So get away! I-I'm breaking up with you."_

_Everything, every piece of me was falling apart. stupid, stupid, stupid, I kept telling myself._

_I couldn't live without Newt. I needed him. He was like some drug to me that I couldn't get enough of, even if he hurt me and I abused him._

_But, I forced myself to get up and walk out._

_I didn't see how broken Newt was._

_I didn't hear him get up._

_I didn't hear him open the window._

_I didn't notice a single god damn thing until he fucking jumped out._

_Until his body crashed into the ground from the second story window._

_He fell on his back. By the time I could make it to his side, his breathing was already almost gone._

_I had done this to him._

_I made him do this._

_Just like my Father did to me._

_I became his poisoning thoughts._

_I cried over his dying body, gripping his hands._

_I told him a long rant of things, how stupid he was, how stupid I was, how I still loved him, that he can't die, that I won't let him die, that I'm sorry. But the second his mouth even opened, I went silent._

_"I-It's okay..." his weak voice started, "you...you weren't y-yourself..A-and I-I can't be myself...n-not without you. B-but you...d-deserve...better.."_

_"I-I only w-want you." My voice broke, silent sobs making my entire body shake._

_Before I could even pull out my phone to call an ambulance, I could tell he was gone._

_He died. And so did I. The poison of my father took over. His harsh words. His hard emotions. His evilness. The loss of my only sense of life pushed me over the edge._

"I killed him. I killed him, I kicked him. Then I picked him up and threw him. I meant to throw him against the wall, but he went out the window. What else do you want me to admit? Do you want me to explain in front of his family how I watched the life fade away from him? How even though I killed him that part of me died with him because I loved him so much? I can explain it all to you. In detail." I threatened, my voice twisted with venom in a sharp yet lifeless tone. 

I could tell no one was expecting me to speak, saying I had just fainted. I stared directly at the Judge. Looking at Newt's family would be too much, his sister looked just like him. I would lose it.

The Judge stared back at me, then spoke in a loud and authoritative tone,

"Thomas Santer, I find you guilty and sentence you life in prison." 

_**Are you happy, Newt? Can I stop feeling so God Damn guilty for all of this? Please. I know I can't have you back. But I want me back. I want to have my mind back; my sanity.** _

Officers handcuffed me and I was taken away. I was put into a high security prison and had a fine first week. My sanity deteriorated more and more. I couldn't stand the guilt.

It was a bright Saturday, I could see through my tiny window, when I was found in my cell. I drowned myself in the toilet.

Despite all I did to him, the first thing I saw after dying was Newt. He greeted me with open arms.

 


End file.
